BLOGPOST #2: EFFECTS OF LIE IN A RELATIONSHIP

How can a lie affect people's relationship towards each other? I'm sure that all of us had experience lying to someone; friends, partners, family etc., and the strong relationship built with that someone somehow slowly crashed because of little lies, may be it white lie or not.

According to an article named "The 7 D's of Relationship Destruction" from the site www.psychologytoday.com, Barton Goldsmith stated that if you don't tell the whole truth as soon as possible, when your mate finds out, it could kill your relationship. Whatever it was you did that you need to fess up to, do it now, so it can be forgiven and dropped. The lies only get more complicated as you withhold the truth, and your partner will only distrust you more when those lies are revealed.

Everybody knows that in a relationship, as much as possible, you must avoid lying for trust is one of the most important key to build a strong relationship.Think how your partner must feel if they know you are more likely to tell a lie than the truth. If you were to quit being a liar however, and stop telling lies on a regular basis, you might be surprised by how much stronger your relationship will become over time.

As Badrton Goldsmith stated, "Avoid these actions and you may actually find yourself living happily ever after" Honesty is one of the key to be in a strong relationship. Imagine your relationship if it's pure honesty and no lies, wouldn't it be happy? Living happily is one of the most wanted thing in this world, it's not easy and you must work hard on it. And if you achieve it, you'll both live happily.

But why do some people lie? In an article entitled "The Effects of Lying in Relationships" from the site www.stoplying.net, according to Debbie Williams, the reason is often to protect their partner. For example, one man decided to start lying to his wife when his business started to have financial difficulties. Although he was trying to keep her from finding out the awful truth, it came out eventually anyway – and the fallout was much worse than it would have been had he decided to stop telling lies right from the start.
The constant lying meant that when his wife did find out, she immediately lost her trust in him. And that kind of trust takes a long time to rebuild. Even though you're trying to protect someone, lying is never an option.

As Dani Johnson states, "If you aren't being truthful about the little things – you will never be trusted with the big things!". Trust is a big thing, you have to earn it. Once you have it, make sure to cherish it. I've heard that little lies won't hurt but combine all those little lies and I'm sure the trust you built will crash. 

Overall, this article states how a simple lie can affect strong strong built relationship. It says how important trust is. Trust basically completes the relationship. White lie is done to protect someone special to you. Even though it's done to protect someone, this can cause an uncomfortable feeling to someone. 

Just like the lyrics in the song "Little White Lies" by One Direction, it goes "If this room was burning, I wouldn't even notice, 'Cause you've been taking up my mind, With your little white lies, little white lies." This basically means that white lies are disturbing even though it's done to protect you. White lies are good enough, but always has a consequence behind it.

BLOGPOST #1: INTRODUCTION TO LIES AND WHITE LIES

What's the difference between a lie and a white lie?
Many people doesn't know the difference between a lie and a white lie. White lies are normally just told as a joke or to protect someone from the truth, whereas lies are intended are intended to actually hurt someone. It may be hard to differentiate between the two though.
Example, the typical boyfriend and girlfriend situation, the woman asks the man if she looks fat in the outfit she is wearing. If he was to say yes, her happiness state will most likely drop, and then his would too because he will most likely get yelled at and normally people don't like being yelled at. Now, if he was to say no, she will be happy and he will be happy and she will be happy... so much happiness.

In an article entitled "We're all lying liars" from the site www.health.usnews.com, Ulchir Boser says that one study found that people tell two to three lies every 10 minutes, and even conservative estimates indicate that we lie at least once a day. Such incessant prevarication might be a necessary social evil, and researchers have recently discovered that some fibbing might actually be good for you. "We use lies to grease the wheels of social discourse," says University of Massachusetts psychologist Robert Feldman. "It's socially useful to tell lies."

Researchers have been studying deception for decades, trying to figure out why we tell lies. It turns out that we spin facts and make up fictions for all sorts of reasons. We might want to gain a raise or a reward, for example, or to protect friends or a lover.

Do these white lies have any influence on your later behavior? This question was explored in a set of studies by Jennifer Argo and Baba Shiv in the April, 2012 issue of the Journal of Consumer Research. These researchers argued that in many cases, white lies have little effect on the teller later. However, in situations in which the policy of being honest is highlighted, liars often do nice things for the person they lied to.

According to an article entitled "The Ethics of Lying" from the site www.philosophy.about.com, Andrea Borghini states that in some circumstances, it seems better to tell a small lie than having someone worrying unnecessarily, or becoming sad, or losing momentum. While actions of this sort seems hard to endorse from the standpoint of a Kantian ethics, they provide one of the most clear-cut arguments in favour of Consequentialism.

These consequences may occur in people's relationships. It is potentially damaging your relationships. All relationships are based on trust. Lying damages that. Even if you never caught there is one person that always knows you're lying. You.

Overall, this article explains that white lies can be socially useful but you have to face some consequences. White lies aren't always right and it can dangerous.

"It's not too late to start being truthful, with yourself and others." says John Seeley. This statement states that you should be honest to yourself and everyone as much as possible. As the article stated above said that it is socially useful, still there are consequences behind those lies. White lie is just a name to differentiate the good ones and bad ones but still, a lie is lie.